Gift-list for Tash's B'day Party

Confirmed Tash-Friend,

Thanks for your RSVP.

You were wondering what to get her, right? We have made it sooo easy for you. Here are three options, of which we're confident, at least one will be to your liking:

1. You already have prepared something you think she'll like. It's personal, it's unique, you've woven lots of love into it (only metaphorically-speaking, we hope, because she hates embroidery and such similar, ghastly crafts. a childhood trauma. don't bring it up.)

or

2. You're good at internet shopping and/or you're familiar with all the sex shops in Taipei:
Get her a VINCE VAUGHN BLOW UP DOLL! See pic for reference (but find one with all the right parts, please!)

or

3. You've nothing personal, you're too lazy to look for a Vince:
Contribute to our 'GIVE TASH a MAKEOVER' Foundation! There are several causes to vote for and contribute to. See them below! Think about your favorite and on the evening of the party you can throw your contribution into the Box and cast a vote for your favorite. As a thank-you, you'll receive Before-and-After pics of the winning makeover.

As you can see, there's something for everyone.



GIVE TASH A MAKEOVER, Because she's 33 now, and that's old! So, do something before it's too late!


1. Tash's Boob foundation
- stop them before they reach 'way down south'

2. Removal of Strange Spot on Butt
- seeing THESE before 'n' afters will cost you extra

3. Do Something With That Hair
- give her a makeover by taipei's best hairstylist

4. Cellulite Task Force
- there's a new product. there's ALWAYS a new product

5. Permanent Laser Hair-Removal
- permanent deforestation of brazilian rainforest
- tash's personal favorite

6. Monthly Facials
- meiling's personal favorite

Tash's B'day Party

Beloved Tash-Friend,

A week from today, on Friday, October 28th, your friend Tash will turn 33. (Don't tell her we told you, though. She's been pretending she's 28 for years. Yeah, right!)

We thought you might actually be the kind of person who has a life and a job, so we've taken the liberty of CAPITALIZING the really essential bits, in this otherwise painfully long email, for your convenience. Scroll down to them and skip the rest.

So, this b'day thing… well, instead of doing the normal thing, which, of course, would be to hide her age and herself under the bed that day, she wants to do the opposite: INVITE YOU TO CELEBRATE IT WITH HER!

Weird, right? Well, we know it's weird, you know it's weird, but she's weird so she doesn't know it's weird, and she pays us a lot of money to do this for her, so please humor her and come to this party. It WILL BE FABULOUS, by the way!

To give you a vague IDEA of what you might expect, see the ATTACHED INVITATION.

Now you're thinking: "What the hell is THIS? Romance In Ice? I thought it was supposed to ba a b'day party?!" That's what you're thinking, right?

O.K. Here's the deal… we are Meiling and Nataša from the !WOWW EVENTS agency. Only the coolest, hippest events gals in Taipei City and County! So, of course everyone wants US to do their b'day PARTIES and other EVENTS, but we're like booked solid all the way till like forever. But when this person Tash approached us we had to do it because she's like family (don't you just hate it when you make it big and all the so-called family starts coming around asking favors?) So then she says (in that nasal, drawn-out voice of hers): "I don't want just ANY old b'day party. Mine's got to be SPECIAL and DIFFERENT!" Gee, SPECIAL and DIFFERENT, like we'd even do anything BUT that!
SPECIAL and DIFFERENT – that's what we DO! Jeez!

O.K... moving on to:

EXTREMELY important details (Don't skip them like you would Terms and Conditions when you're installing software, or if you're a guy, instructions for any type of electrical device. Skipping these is far more dangerous than getting into trouble with the IP people or electrocuting yourself!) :

1. 
   Please, do RSVP us by SUNDAY 23rd if you're coming! We're running a TIGHT ship.
   Invitations are EXCLUSIVE. YOU are SPECIAL and have been selected using extremely rigorous criteria. If, HOWEVER, you simply cannot come without bringing your favorite spouse, dog, child, cousin and/or mom and brother visiting from Hungary, it's ok. because apparently, Tash wants you to come SO MUCH that she'll take all kinds of crap from you, and so do we, because she's the boss here. But, still, please exercise restraint.
2. 
   USE PUBLIC TRANSPORT or TAXI. DON'T DRIVE!!! We can't stress enough how sorry you will be if you don't take this piece of advice seriously. Not so much to do with the lack of parking space, but more to do with the fabulous cocktails we'll be consuming that evening.
3. 
   LOCATION will be revealed to you just before you need to know. It's enough to say for now that it's in Taipei City, and that there is an MRT station nearby.
4. 
   GIFT: nothing you need to worry your pretty heads with. You'll know in due time and we promise it'll be simple. Or, not.
5. 
   DRESS-CODE: casual, warm. Like you would for an apres-ski party, or if you were the lead in Dr. Zhivago (actually, we recommend renting Dr. Zhivago on DVD prior to the event anyway, in order to get yourselves into the mood). Try not to leave any skin uncovered. Ladies, NOT your favorite pair of shoes.

On all points: More details after RSVP

To confirm, reply to this email and say something like:
"Yes" or
"Yes, I'll come" or
"I'll come, but don't expect me to be romantic or anything goofy like that!" or
"Sure, but I don't get any of this."

See you there!

The !WOWW gRLZ
(on behalf of Tash)

The Perfection Series: Falling

Falling for 30 seconds towards the earth.

But, not only that part... also, the moment of deciding to push yourself off and jump off the plane, or bungee platform, that's perfection, too.

PMS All Clear

It's over. Go back to living your lives.

For those of you who had the misfortune to find yourselves in the disaster area during this past weekend, a fund has been set up for the families of the victims. For more information, call: +886 STP-PMS-MDNSS