End of Ugly Month February

I know my mom, for one, will be happy this month is over. No more disgusting pics of her daughter and her decomposing body.
One more before we go:

But this one was ugly on purpose, so it doesn't really count.

And that concludes the Ugly Month, kids! Hope you've enjoyed it.

Special thanks to Joytoyz for the inspiration ;-)

Ultimate Ugly Pic

Two days left in February.

Two days left to post ugly pictures.

Here’s the ultimate ugly pic. Taken four years ago for my Croatian passport.

I have no explanation for it. I don’t remember looking THAT ugly, but maybe I was in denial.

And as long as we're on the subject of ID photos...

ID photos are serious stuff in Taiwan, especially to women. Sure, everywhere around the world women like to look good on their passports and driver's licenses, but the level of importance seems to be raised a couple of notches here in Taiwan.

This new law came out recently, dictating stricter rules for identification documents photos. "All five organs must be clearly visible", to paraphrase the regulation. I've tried to figure out which 5 organs those could be: eyes, nose, ears, mouth... one is missing. I don't know which other one they mean.
Because suddenly everyone needed new ID photos, our company arranged for a professional photographer to come to the office and get everyone new photos at a reasonable price. I didn't need it, but all my female colleagues were getting very excited over it, so I wanted to see what the fuss was all about.

Two weeks later we all got our little envelopes with about 10 prints and a digital version on a CD. We all burst out laughing at the result. Here's mine. The Freaky Manequin photo.

Others' were no better than mine. At first, we couldn't figure out what was so weird about them. Then I realized... they retouched them. All of them. With mine, they put make up on my lips and cheeks. Tidied up my hair (yes, this is the tidy version) and erased the contours of my nose in the area between my eyes! Can you believe it? That's why my eyes look further apart then they should be.

Needless to say, I won't be using this photo for any ID.

The best use found for it so far: My friend Joyce shows it to her students to scare them with the creepy WaiGuoRen.

Toe Tragedy

More disgusting photos from me...

It's a fungal nail infection. I caught it here in Taiwan sometime last year. Probably in the summer, from walking around barefoot all the time. Especially in the showerroom at the gym. Never had it before, so I didn't recognize it in time.

It doesn't hurt, it's just ugly and damn hard to get rid of. It'll take about 8 months, if I treat it every day.

I think I'll make February the Month of Ugly Pix. Coming up next: Tasha's worst ID photo. From my Croatian passport. Must scan it first.

Not A Pretty Corpse

I was bored in the bathtub the other day, which also happened to be the day I discovered new functions on my digital camera. You would think that these two circumstances put together would result in some very sexy photos.

Sorry. No.

It resulted in this:


This proves one thing: I most definitely will NOT make a pretty corpse.

So, when I die I don’t want anyone to look at me. Wrap me up and burn me.

Which brings me to a more serious point. Most of those close to me know this already, but it can’t hurt to let everyone know, you never know who will have the honor of me dying in their living room, so here it is:

Ever since I can remember I’ve known that I want to be cremated and for my ashes to be scattered over the Adriatic Sea near Brač.

Boerenkoolstampot

Time for a lesson in Dutch language and culture, kids.

Boerenkoolstampot.

It's a mouthful, I know. But Boerenkoolstampot happens to be the most typical Dutch dish. It's made of some green stuff called boerenkool, potatoes and a big sausage called rookworst. They all get cooked and mashed together.

It sounds pretty simple, doesn’t it? But, at Kees and Diana’s house it’s anything BUT simple!

See, the problem is that Diana makes her Boerenkoolstampot the way her mom makes it: WITH appelmoes (applesauce).

Kees makes his withOUT appelmoes, as do 99,9% of stampot-making Dutch people.

Kees cooked this evening, but Diana put a pot of appelmoes on the table. There was some tension in the air. (notice the yellow pot between the plates? that's appelmoes!)
But then I designed my Borenkoolstampot Pacman Chasing A Piece Of Rookworst on the plate and the tension was relieved momentarily.
Kees’ Boerenkoolstampot was LEKKER!